Dear neglected reader:

Before I get to the actual blog-blog, please accept my apologies for my absence over the holidays.  I assure you I thought of you quite often, and took plenty of pictures for us to look and laugh at. The Holiday cheer finally caught up with my ass and I went down -I went down HARD. A week after gallons of snot, buckets of phlegm, thousands of tissues (If I owned stock in the klee-nex company I'd be a bazillionaire) and long hot sweaty baths, I'm starting to feel less like an alien drama queen sent to earth to be tortured by sickness for failing to bathe enough on her home planet and more like myself... 

Besides, Lady GaGa does the whole alien drama queen thing WAAAAY better than me:

And now to the first blog of the New Year 2012: 

On this universal day of resolution making, feelings of strong determination, and hope for something better to come; I reflected on what could possibly need such a drastic change in my life that required an absolute resolution, not just a general goal to shoot for in the future. Some people take this type of attitude when it comes to thinking about changing something for the new year......

 ....but I like the feeling of a fresh start the new year gives, even if I will write 2011 on everything, by mistake, for the next month......

 I have never been satisfied with the general and ambiguous resolutions like 'Enjoy life more', 'get organized' or the obvious 'lose weight.' I started to ponder what I stood for in life, and what is important to me....

and quite frankly, in no way does this show motivate me except to put more hot fudge on my ice cream when I'm watching it.

 I know I firmly believe in the power of acceptance and choice. Accepting your past because you absolutely cannot change it and ultimately, it helped shape your character (and really, if you had the choice WOULD you change it?). Accepting others because, again, you cannot change or control their emotions; you can only control how YOU react- so stop being upset with everyone else. And accepting yourself. Being human you can't help but have emotions, bad moods, jealousy, pettiness, mistakes, and regret. When you do finally accept yourself-the good parts as well as the emotional warts, scars, and baggage-you realize: it is what it is.  You don't need to constantly beat yourself up for not being someone you think you should be. Basically, you start each day being exactly who you are, and you can choose to strive to become better. Some days you achieve that and some days you don't, all you can do is consciously try your best. You don't want to be like this: 

 Holding on tight to the principles of acceptance and choice, I decided what my official "resolution" will be (which to me, is more like creating a new habit): Be kind to myself.  I don't mean looking in the mirror and telling myself how awesome I am  (let's be honest this is NOT hard to do...), but each day making choices that make me feel good. If I feel good, complete and content I can be my best and give my best to others. 

Realizing this was just as broad and ambiguous as "lose weight'' I narrowed down the 10 things that make me say, 'aahhh bliss: reached' and/or things I need to start implementing: 


1. Getting into a bed with clean sheets and freshly shaved legs - best feeling ever.

2. Eating healthy real food, not junk from a box- and for heaven's sake, not just salad, but whole grains, steamed vegetables, sauces, and cheeses galore- oh my! I think what I'm trying to say is not eat out so damn much.

3. A good, hearty, from the belly, made me cry laugh--if you know me, then you know this comes pretty easily.

4. A somewhat picked up house - I love feeling like everything is in it's place...why don't I do this more often and make myself happy!?  Because I'm good at accepting that's why!

5. Reading/researching/questioning--I already do this to a fault, which leads me to my next point:

6. Getting SOLID sleep--I feel amazeballs after a good night sleep, it's about time I got off the internet or put the book down to let my body rest properly.

7.  Being creative in some way-- I love the feeling of thinking out a project, creating art, writing a story, or moving the furniture around in my house for the millionth time.

8. When I am nice to someone and it kind of makes them feel a little better--I really like being friendly with everyone, especially employees of banks/stores/customer service etc. One time the workers at Wendy's told me I was their favorite customer and then they became my favorite fast-food workers, until I found a hair in my salad-TWICE.

9. Exercising--I've been doing this as of late and I feel like a boss when I'm done so I'm choosing to keep this up. 

10. Volunteering--I like people. I like helping. I like helping people. "People helping people it's powerful stuff (name that movie quote)."

I realize these are still broad; and I won't achieve them everyday, but I can totally accept that.

Happy New Year from the girl who takes a picture with her grandmother, doing this: