Ok maybe King Kong on top of your building doesn't really make it hidden but it's still a gem!!
He isn't yelling, Chris just told him a joke and he has a really ugly "laugh" face...
First we met Forrest Gump. He was quite the talker and did NOT offer to share a chocolate. Rude. Chris is saying "Forrest you're so wise and smart even if you don't- hey look at that squirrel!"
Oh don't act like you aren't enjoying it, Marie! You French hussy you!
Well I knew I most certainly could not let Chris have all the fun, so I grabbed the closest celeb and gave him the 'ol 'JESSICA MAGIC' :
Pierce Brosnan, you sexy bea- hey! Why are you trying to run! Get back here! Hold still, YOU!!
That's ok if he ran from me because I saw Jeannie and she granted me a wish.
What did I wish for?? Matt Damon of course!
WISH GRANTED! Although,
Chris didn't like that so much, and beat him up....I just can't take him ANYWHERE!
I decided to brush up on my comedic skills with Charlie Chaplin...
he wasn't too please that I took his signature hat right off his head, and shooed me away with his cain.
Chris was not intimidated by the fact we were in the presence of genius comedians and challenged Groucho Marx to a thumb wrestling match.
Chris may have one the thumb wrestling battle, but Groucho undeniably wins the "best mustache" war.
Chris was intrigued by the hand placement of Stan Laurel of Laurel and Hardy.
He determined it to be some kind of early century comedian gang sign.
We were then whisked away to the star ship 'Enterprise' where Chris challenged Spock to an intellectual debate.
Already knowing I was smarter than Mr. Spock and no debate was needed, I just shouted:
"Beam me up Scotty!"
This picture goes to show you that Chris is a sly devil....
he'll get on your good side with his good looks, charm and those blue eyes but if you cross him....
LOOK OUT!
"No one says the Chiefs suck and gets away with it!"
(The fact that Chris looks to be smiling in this photo makes me slightly nervous....)
It's a good thing I was there to protect and serve with Charlie's angels because,
Willie Nelson was there, and he's OLD....
he was also super paranoid his illegal substance hiding spot would be found out (hint: he wears that bandana an AWFUL lot!).
Life tip: If Elvis offers you an ice cream cone you do NOT refuse!
Elvis and the gang were just chilling out in the diner. Chris decided it was 'now or never' and went to show Marilyn his TRUE feelings.
Then he realized there is NO WAY this beauty was Marilyn Monroe, but a cross-dressing imposter!
He kissed her anyways.
Nacho Libre was mad that Chris was hitting on 'ol Marilyn and challenged him to a duel:
so Chris body slammed him.
Nascar racers also like to hang out at this "hidden gem" of Branson, Chris was so excited to meet "Ricky Bobby" of Talladega Nights, he didn't know what to do with his hands!
You wouldn't know it by his extremely serious face, but right before this picture
Will Smith told me a HIGHlarious joke.
I tried to tell the Men in Black that their car was at the Branson auto museum, but they were extremely distracted by this (or should I say these):
I tried to tell the Men in Black that their car was at the Branson auto museum, but they were extremely distracted by this (or should I say these):
I tried to tell myself, Chris was really just interest in Angelina Jolie's brain, but I knew the truth:
The round body parts on the chest are FAR more interesting than the round part that sits atop of Halle Berry's shoulders!
I wasn't jealous though.
I totally married Johnny Depp while I was there.
Chris was ok with my marrying Johnny, but he was NONE to please with Hugh Hefner:
Why? Because Chris walked into this:
"Not tonight, Hef darling, I've got a headache."
So next time you're in the mid-west Las Vegas, make sure to hit this spot up.....
and tell them a very angry Samuel L. Jackson and Jessica sent you.
**Check back tomorrow, and I'll tell you how we definitely time-traveled to the great year 1881**
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