Stylin' and profilin'

I don't know if you realize this but, I'm kind of awesome at fashion. No really! My style is impeccable! I never leave the house without make up (this is a lie.), I ALWAYS have my hair fixed perfectly (this is also a lie.), and I'm always dressed in accordance with the latest fashions (HUGE lie).....which is why my family concerns me a bit. They THINK they are in style but.....well let's just let the evidence speak for itself:

 Yup, I totally married this guy, beard and all.

The beard is quite the fashion statement. It says: I can chop down trees, fish, hunt, hit a baseball and kick your ass!

HEY YOU! LOOK OUT!

Or the Denim family will get you!!

The best part of this picture is NOT my dad's mullet, my vacant stare, or the denim we obviously got on discount, but my brother Christian's face. It says: "I'M THE MIDDLE CHILD AND I'M THE BEST!"

I needed to dig further back in my files and then I found this little gem:

 Since this picture of my grandparents is from the late 80's, I'm not sure if I should guffaw at grandma's outrageous polka dot yellow outfit (with huge earrings for an accessory), or applaud her.

However, I'm definitely applauding grandpa's mustache!!

 This is my mom and me.....

That is the face of a baby impressed by blue tiger socks, hell I'm still impressed!

You now know why there is a hole in the ozone layer, two words: Aquanet hairspray.

The best part of this picture? My uncle put on his leisure suit, side combed his Hulk Hogan looking hair, trimmed his side burns and mustache then backed away from the mirror and sincerely proclaimed, : "I'm lookin' gooood. I look so good,  I'm gonna kick this family picture's sorry behind all the way into 1978!"

What in the what?!

The middle child is clearly channeling the rapper, eminem. To be fair, Christian probably has the most style out of all of us..........

 

See what I mean?

In reality, he does come by it honestly. It's so obvious that the very best dressed.....

ALWAYS STYLIN'......

...... AND PROFILIN' AND TOTAL FASHION GANGSTA'

.......IS WITHOUT A SHADOW OF A DOUBT.......

Note the dirty jeans, half painted fingernails, greasy hair and outrageous lip color...

...... IS MOST DEFINITELY......

ME!!!

Oh wait, I take that back: 

Yes.

Don't worry, if you drive 2 hours one way everyday for four years to finish Chiropractic college with honors, then you can have a mullet/beard/Harry Potter glasses combination too!